Steven Wright Quotes

So, do you live around here often?
Steven Wright

You can't have everything. Where would you put it?
Steven Wright

I wrote a few children's books... not on purpose.
Steven Wright

At one point he decided enough was enough.
Steven Wright

On the other hand, you have different fingers.
Steven Wright

I went to a general store. They wouldn't let me buy anything specifically.
Steven Wright

A lot of people are afraid of heights. Not me, I'm afraid of widths.
Steven Wright

Steven Wright Quotes
		I met this wonderful girl at Macy's. She was buying clothes and I was putting Slinkies on the escalator. Steven Wright Vote on this Quote: Bad <---> Good
		Author Details: Type: Comedian Quotes Category: American Comedian Quotes Date of Birth: December 6, 1955 Nationality: American Amazon: Steven Wright on Amazon	Related Authors: George Carlin Bill Cosby Groucho Marx W. C. Fields Mitch Hedberg Rodney Dangerfield Jack Benny Steve Martin
		Select Steven Wright Quotations: So, do you live around here often? Steven Wright You can't have everything. Where would you put it? Steven Wright I wrote a few children's books... not on purpose. Steven Wright At one point he decided enough was enough. Steven Wright On the other hand, you have different fingers. Steven Wright I went to a general store. They wouldn't let me buy anything specifically. Steven Wright A lot of people are afraid of heights. Not me, I'm afraid of widths. Steven Wright
Quote Keywords: Buying, Clothes, Escalator, Girl, Met, Putting, She, Wonderful	Dictionary Links: Buying, Clothes, Escalator, Girl, Met, Putting, She, Wonderful	All Steven Wright Quotations: A lot of people are afraid... At one point he decided enough... Babies don't need a vacation, but... Cross country skiing is great if... Curiosity killed the cat, but for... Do Lipton employees take coffee breaks? Do you think that when they... Don't you hate when your hand... Ever notice how irons have a... Everywhere is within walking distance if... For my birthday I got a... George is a radio announcer, and... Hermits have no peer pressure. How young can you die of... I bought some batteries, but they... I bought some instant water one... I busted a mirror and got... I drive way too fast to... I got a chain letter by... I got this powdered water - now... I had a friend who was... I had some eyeglasses. I was... I had to stop driving my... I have an answering machine in... I have an existential map. It... I have the world's largest collection... I hooked up my accelerator pedal... I installed a skylight in my... I intend to live forever. So... I invented the cordless extension cord. I like to reminisce with people... I live on a one-way... I met this wonderful girl at... I play the harmonica. The only... I poured spot remover on my... I put instant coffee in a... I remember when the candle shop... I replaced the headlights in my... I saw a bank that said... I saw a subliminal advertising executive... I stayed in a really old... I think God's going to come... I think it's wrong that only... I used to work in a... I was a peripheral visionary. I... I was reading the dictionary. I... I was trying to daydream, but... I was walking down the street... I watched the Indy 500, and... I went down the street to... I went to a general store... I went to a general store... I went to a restaurant that... I went to the bank and... I went to the museum where... I wrote a few children's books... I'm writing a book. I've got... I'm writing an unauthorized autobiography. If a word in the dictionary... If God dropped acid, would he... If it's a penny for your... If one synchronised swimmer drowns, do... If you are in a spaceship... If you can't hear me, it's... If you had a million Shakespeares... If you saw a heat wave... If you shoot at mimes, should... If you tell a joke in... If you were going to shoot... In Vegas, I got into a... Is it weird in here, or... It doesn't make a difference what... It doesn't matter what temperature the... It's a small world, but I... Last night I stayed up late... Last week the candle factory burned... Last year I went fishing with... My friend has a baby. I'm... My neighbor has a circular driveway... My roommate got a pet elephant... My theory of evolution is that... On the other hand, you have... Right now I'm having amnesia and... So, do you live around here often? Sponges grow in the ocean. That... The Bermuda Triangle got tired of... The other day I... uh, no... There was a power outage at... There's a fine line between fishing... What a nice night for an evening. What's another word for Thesaurus? When I die, I'm leaving my... When I was a kid, I... When I was a little kid... When I was crossing the border... When I woke up this morning... Whenever I think of the past... Why don't they make the whole... You can't have everything. Where would...

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