Jury Quotes

I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.
Groucho Marx

Judge, Married, Asked

A jury consists of twelve persons chosen to decide who has the better lawyer.
Robert Frost

Lawyer, Decide, Chosen

The jury consist of twelve persons chosen to decide who has the better lawyer.
Robert Frost

Lawyer, Decide, Chosen

The penalty for laughing in a courtroom is six months in jail; if it were not for this penalty, the jury would never hear the evidence.
H. L. Mencken

Hear, Jail, Laughing

Political systems are run by self-selecting politicians. We don't draft people; it's not jury duty.
P. J. O'Rourke

Political, Run, Duty

There is no such thing as an impartial jury because there are no impartial people. There are people that argue on the web for hours about who their favorite character on 'Friends' is.
Jon Stewart

Character, Friends, Hours

A fox should not be on the jury at a goose's trial.
Thomas Fuller

Trial, Fox, Goose

When you go into court you are putting your fate into the hands of twelve people who weren't smart enough to get out of jury duty.
Norm Crosby

Smart, Enough, Fate

A pun does not commonly justify a blow in return. But if a blow were given for such cause, and death ensued, the jury would be judges both of the facts and of the pun, and might, if the latter were of an aggravated character, return a verdict of justifiable homicide.
Oliver Wendell Holmes

Death, Character, Both

I vote and I do jury duty.
Christopher Hitchens

We operate under a jury system in this country, and as much as we complain about it, we have to admit that we know of no better system, except possibly flipping a coin.
Dave Barry

Country, System, Except

It's not our job to play judge and jury, to determine who is worthy of our kindness and who is not. We just need to be kind, unconditionally and without ulterior motive, even - or rather, especially - when we'd prefer not to be.
Josh Radnor

Judge, Kindness, Job

A jury is composed of twelve men of average ignorance.
Herbert Spencer

Men, Ignorance, Average

The jury could get the case as early as next week, but the defense says they just want to introduce one last-minute load of crap.
Bill Maher

Next, Week, Early

If the jury have no right to judge of the justice of a law of the government, they plainly can do nothing to protect the people against the oppressions of the government; for there are no oppressions which the government may not authorize by law.
Lysander Spooner

Government, Judge, Justice

Good-looking individuals are treated better than homely ones in virtually every social situation, from dating to trial by jury.
Martha Beck

Dating, Social, Situation

Well I was on the jury duty on the Deauville Film Festival, a few years ago.
Liam Neeson

Few, Film, Duty

A jury is a group of twelve people of average ignorance.
Herbert Spencer

Ignorance, Group, Average

The defendant wants to hide the truth because he's generally guilty. The defense attorney's job is to make sure the jury does not arrive at that truth.
Alan Dershowitz

Truth, Job, Guilty

My parents wanted me to be a lawyer. But I don't think I would have been very happy. I'd be in front of the jury singing.
Jennifer Lopez

Happy, Parents, Wanted

Every trial lawyer knows what it is like to sit patiently while the other side puts on its case. Inevitably they make a few points that appeal to the jury, and waiting for the opportunity to respond can be painful. The desire to jump up immediately - to point out the flaws in logic or the factual distortions - is often overpowering.
Eliot Spitzer

Waiting, Often, Few

Ending racial discrimination in jury selection can be accomplished only by eliminating peremptory challenges entirely.
Thurgood Marshall

Challenges, Ending, Racial

When you hear in the tape recordings Nixon's own voice saying, We have to stonewall, We have to lie to the Grand Jury, We have to pay burglars a million dollars, it's all too clear the horror of what went on.
Bob Woodward

Saying, Lie, Voice

It is surely easier to confess a murder over a cup of coffee than in front of a jury.
Friedrich Durrenmatt

Coffee, Front, Cup

It would be enough for me to have the system of a jury of twelve versus the system of one judge as a basis for preferring the U.S. to the Soviet Union. I would prefer the country you can leave to the country you cannot.
Joseph Brodsky

Judge, Country, Enough

Along the way I have been able to choose some themes which ask questions - not necessarily force a message on anyone, but at least invite the audience to question things: jury service, dignity in dying, Ireland - and not least because they force me to ask myself questions. Where do I stand?
Julie Walters

Service, Able, Question

The grand jury, composed of 12 eminent New Orleans citizens, heard our evidence and indicted the defendant for participation in a conspiracy to assassinate John Kennedy.
Jim Garrison

Heard, Evidence, Conspiracy

Trial by jury. Live wherever you can make a living. How could a government based on such principles fail?
Stephen Ambrose

Government, Live, Living

The jury had down right contempt for punk rock grass roots ethics.
Jello Biafra

Rock, Down, Punk

If you violate Nature's laws you are your own prosecuting attorney, judge, jury, and hangman.
Luther Burbank

Nature, Judge, Laws

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J. R. R. Tolkien

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