Guy Quotes

You have brains in your head. You have feet in your shoes. You can steer yourself in any direction you choose. You're on your own, and you know what you know. And you are the guy who'll decide where to go.
Dr. Seuss

Yourself, Direction, Shoes

At home I am a nice guy: but I don't want the world to know. Humble people, I've found, don't get very far.
Muhammad Ali

Home, Nice, Humble

Wearing a turtleneck is like being strangled by a really weak guy, all day. Wearing a backpack and a turtleneck is like a weak midget trying to bring you down.
Mitch Hedberg

Down, Trying, Weak

I was at this casino minding my own business, and this guy came up to me and said, 'You're gonna have to move, you're blocking a fire exit.' As though if there was a fire, I wasn't gonna run. If you're flammible and have legs, you are never blocking a fire exit.
Mitch Hedberg

Business, Fire, Said

I want to be perceived as a guy who played his best in all facets, not just scoring. A guy who loved challenges.
Michael Jordan

Best, Loved, Played

I would never want to be a member of a group whose symbol was a guy nailed to two pieces of wood.
George Carlin

Two, Group, Whose

As a teenager I was so insecure. I was the type of guy that never fitted in because he never dared to choose. I was convinced I had absolutely no talent at all. For nothing. And that thought took away all my ambition too.
Johnny Depp

Nothing, Thought, Insecure

And where I excel is ridiculous, sickening, work ethic. You know, while the other guy's sleeping? I'm working.
Will Smith

Work, Working, While

If you're looking for the safe choice, you shouldn't be supporting a black guy named Barack Obama to be the next leader of the free world.
Barack Obama

Black, Free, Leader

It's not an act. I love it. It's totally original. People go, 'What's going on with this guy? Why does he sound so weird? What is going on in his brain. I don't know. Just one day I suddenly woke up with a new brain.
Charlie Sheen

Love, Brain, Why

I think I have a duty as a recovering guy to help, to make my knowledge of what I went through accessible.
Charlie Sheen

Knowledge, Help, Through

I've got volumes on how not to behave. I've got more information now than a guy should have at my age.
Charlie Sheen

Age, Behave, Volumes

There was a reason my first substantial role after rehab was to play a maniac whose personal story ended badly. I knew what it was like to go those dark places. I played a guy who died as a result of his abuse.
Charlie Sheen

Play, Dark, After

I've got mad energy for days. That's what people can't get their minds around. They say, 'Oh, he's going to crash.' They try to apply all these common terms to a guy who is not common. I don't fit into their little box.
Charlie Sheen

Try, Energy, Around

I'm an old-fashioned guy... I want to be an old man with a beer belly sitting on a porch, looking at a lake or something.
Johnny Depp

Old, Beer, Looking

A bachelor is a guy who never made the same mistake once.
Phyllis Diller

Made, Same, Once

Only the guy who isn't rowing has time to rock the boat.
Jean-Paul Sartre

Time, Rock, Boat

I ain't the same person I was when I bit that guy's ear off.
Mike Tyson

Person, Same, Off

I went down the street to the 24-hour grocery. When I got there, the guy was locking the front door. I said, 'Hey, the sign says you're open 24 hours.' He said, 'Yes, but not in a row.'
Steven Wright

Down, Said, Door

You see a lot of smart guys with dumb women, but you hardly ever see a smart woman with a dumb guy.
Erica Jong

Women, Smart, Woman

I'm a lucky guy and I'm happy to be with the Yankees. And I want to thank everyone for making this night necessary.
Yogi Berra

Happy, Night, Everyone

If you get a guy that can play a couple positions, it helps you out a real lot.
Yogi Berra

Real, Play, Couple

I like the bad-boy types. Generally the guy I'm attracted to is the guy in the club with all the tattoos and nail polish. He's usually the lead singer in a punk band and plays guitar. But my serious boyfriends are relatively clean-cut, nice guys. So it's strange.
Megan Fox

Nice, Strange, Guitar

A composer is a guy who goes around forcing his will on unsuspecting air molecules, often with the assistance of unsuspecting musicians.
Frank Zappa

Around, Often, Musicians

I like video games, but they are very violent. I want to create a video game in which you have to help all the characters who have died in the other games. 'Hey, man, what are you playing?' 'Super Busy Hospital. Could you leave me alone? I'm performing surgery! This guy got shot in the head, like, 27 times!'
Demetri Martin

Alone, Help, Busy

A guy is a lump like a doughnut. So, first you gotta get rid of all the stuff his mom did to him. And then you gotta get rid of all that macho crap that they pick up from beer commercials. And then there's my personal favorite, the male ego.
Roseanne Barr

I'm a movie maker, but I have the same feelings as the average guy out there.
Clint Eastwood

Feelings, Same, Movie

The president may be a nice guy, but he's just over his head.
Mitt Romney

Nice, May, President

When I was a kid, I went to the store and asked the guy, Do you have any toy train schedules?
Steven Wright

Kid, Asked, Train

One day some guy is going to get a billion-dollar fight.
Mike Tyson

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