Golf Quotes

It's good sportsmanship to not pick up lost golf balls while they are still rolling.
Mark Twain

Good, Lost, While

Golf is a good walk spoiled.
Mark Twain

Good, Walk, Spoiled

For a competitive junkie like me, golf is a great solution because it smacks you in the face every time you think you have accomplished something. That to me has taken over a lot of the energy and competitiveness for basketball.
Michael Jordan

Time, Great, Basketball

I'm not feeling very well - I need a doctor immediately. Ring the nearest golf course.
Groucho Marx

Feeling, Doctor, Ring

Hockey is a sport for white men. Basketball is a sport for black men. Golf is a sport for white men dressed like black pimps.
Tiger Woods

Men, Basketball, Black

The income tax has made liars out of more Americans than golf.
Will Rogers

Liars, Made, Tax

I guess there is nothing that will get your mind off everything like golf. I have never been depressed enough to take up the game, but they say you get so sore at yourself you forget to hate your enemies.
Will Rogers

Hate, Yourself, Mind

The game of golf would lose a great deal if croquet mallets and billiard cues were allowed on the putting green.
Ernest Hemingway

Great, Game, Lose

I enjoy now doing what I do... playing golf, relaxing a little, enjoying life.
Yogi Berra

Life, Enjoy, Playing

I found golf was too time consuming, but I did enjoy it.
John Wooden

Time, Enjoy, Found

I didn't know much about golf growing up.
Yogi Berra

The only time my prayers are never answered is on the golf course.
Billy Graham

Time, Prayers, Answered

It is impossible to imagine Goethe or Beethoven being good at billiards or golf.
H. L. Mencken

Good, Impossible, Imagine

The place of the father in the modern suburban family is a very small one, particularly if he plays golf.
Bertrand Russell

Family, Father, Small

I still don't get golf.
Lance Armstrong

I regard golf as an expensive way of playing marbles.
Gilbert K. Chesterton

Playing, Expensive, Regard

As a kid, I might have been psycho, I guess, but I used to throw golf balls in the trees and try and somehow make par from them. I thought that was fun.
Tiger Woods

Fun, Thought, Try

It's nice to win. I'll never win again. I may have to take up golf - take on Tiger.
Lance Armstrong

If you are caught on a golf course during a storm and are afraid of lightning, hold up a 1-iron. Not even God can hit a 1-iron.
Lee Trevino

God, Storm, Afraid

Anyone who watches golf on television would enjoy watching the grass grow on the greens.
Andy Rooney

Enjoy, Anyone, Grow

While playing golf today I hit two good balls. I stepped on a rake.
Henny Youngman

Good, Today, Two

Don't force your kids into sports. I never was. To this day, my dad has never asked me to go play golf. I ask him. It's the child's desire to play that matters, not the parent's desire to have the child play. Fun. Keep it fun.
Tiger Woods

Dad, Sports, Fun

Achievements on the golf course are not what matters, decency and honesty are what matter.
Tiger Woods

Honesty, Matter, Matters

It took me seventeen years to get three thousand hits in baseball. I did it in one afternoon on the golf course.
Hank Aaron

Baseball, Three, Afternoon

If you think it's hard to meet new people, try picking up the wrong golf ball.
Jack Lemmon

Hard, Try, Wrong

The uglier a man's legs are, the better he plays golf - it's almost a law.
H. G. Wells

Law, Almost, Legs

Although golf was originally restricted to wealthy, overweight Protestants, today it's open to anybody who owns hideous clothing.
Dave Barry

Today, Anybody, Open

Give me golf clubs, fresh air and a beautiful partner, and you can keep the clubs and the fresh air.
Jack Benny

Beautiful, Give, Keep

If you watch a game, it's fun. If you play it, it's recreation. If you work at it, it's golf.
Bob Hope

Work, Fun, Game

Golf is a game in which you yell 'fore,' shoot six, and write down five.
Paul Harvey

Game, Down, Write

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