I read about eight newspapers in a day. When I'm in a town with only one newspaper, I read it eight times.
Will Rogers

I'm not a member of any organized political party, I'm a Democrat!
Will Rogers

I'm not a real movie star. I've still got the same wife I started out with twenty-eight years ago.
Will Rogers

If advertisers spent the same amount of money on improving their products as they do on advertising then they wouldn't have to advertise them.
Will Rogers

If I studied all my life, I couldn't think up half the number of funny things passed in one session of congress.
Will Rogers

If Stupidity got us into this mess, then why can't it get us out?
Will Rogers

If the other fellow sells cheaper than you, it is called dumping. 'Course, if you sell cheaper than him, that's mass production.
Will Rogers

If you can build a business up big enough, it's respectable.
Will Rogers

If you ever injected truth into politics you have no politics.
Will Rogers

If you make any money, the government shoves you in the creek once a year with it in your pockets, and all that don't get wet you can keep.
Will Rogers

If you want to be successful, it's just this simple. Know what you are doing. Love what you are doing. And believe in what you are doing.
Will Rogers

In Hollywood the woods are full of people that learned to write but evidently can't read. If they could read their stuff, they'd stop writing.
Will Rogers

In Hollywood you can see things at night that are fast enough to be in the Olympics in the day time.
Will Rogers

Instead of giving money to found colleges to promote learning, why don't they pass a constitutional amendment prohibiting anybody from learning anything? If it works as good as the Prohibition one did, why, in five years we would have the smartest race of people on earth.
Will Rogers

It isn't what we don't know that gives us trouble, it's what we know that ain't so.
Will Rogers

It's a good thing we don't get all the government we pay for.
Will Rogers

It's easy being a humorist when you've got the whole government working for you.
Will Rogers

It's not what you pay a man, but what he costs you that counts.
Will Rogers

Last year we said, 'Things can't go on like this', and they didn't, they got worse.
Will Rogers

Let advertisers spend the same amount of money improving their product that they do on advertising and they wouldn't have to advertise it.
Will Rogers