Mark Twain Quotes

Sometimes too much to drink is barely enough.
Mark Twain

New Year's, Enough, Sometimes

Don't part with your illusions. When they are gone, you may still exist, but you have ceased to live.
Mark Twain

Live, May, Gone

Cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education.
Mark Twain

Education, Nothing, College

A round man cannot be expected to fit in a square hole right away. He must have time to modify his shape.
Mark Twain

Time, Cannot, Away

I can live for two months on a good compliment.
Mark Twain

Good, Live, Two

I don't give a damn for a man that can only spell a word one way.
Mark Twain

Give, Word, Spell

Buy land, they're not making it anymore.
Mark Twain

Making, Land, Anymore

Don't tell fish stories where the people know you; but particularly, don't tell them where they know the fish.
Mark Twain

Tell, Fish, Stories

There are basically two types of people. People who accomplish things, and people who claim to have accomplished things. The first group is less crowded.
Mark Twain

Two, Group, Less

Let us live so that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry.
Mark Twain

Sorry, Live, Die

Honesty is the best policy - when there is money in it.
Mark Twain

Money, Best, Honesty

It is curious that physical courage should be so common in the world and moral courage so rare.
Mark Twain

Courage, Moral, Common

When people do not respect us we are sharply offended; yet in his private heart no man much respects himself.
Mark Twain

Respect, Heart, Himself

As an example to others, and not that I care for moderation myself, it has always been my rule never to smoke when asleep, and never to refrain from smoking when awake.
Mark Twain

Care, Others, Smoking

Loyalty to petrified opinion never yet broke a chain or freed a human soul.
Mark Twain

Loyalty, Human, Soul

Reader, suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself.
Mark Twain

Idiot, Congress, Repeat

It's good sportsmanship to not pick up lost golf balls while they are still rolling.
Mark Twain

Sports, Good, Lost

Everything human is pathetic. The secret source of humor itself is not joy but sorrow. There is no humor in heaven.
Mark Twain

Humor, Human, Everything

Man was made at the end of the week's work when God was tired.
Mark Twain

Work, God, Tired

Golf is a good walk spoiled.
Mark Twain

Sports, Good, Walk

It's no wonder that truth is stranger than fiction. Fiction has to make sense.
Mark Twain

Truth, Sense, Wonder

Be careless in your dress if you will, but keep a tidy soul.
Mark Twain

Soul, Keep, Careless

When you fish for love, bait with your heart, not your brain.
Mark Twain

Love, Heart, Brain

Climate is what we expect, weather is what we get.
Mark Twain

Weather, Expect, Climate

It is better to deserve honors and not have them than to have them and not deserve them.
Mark Twain

Deserve, Honors

Share with your Friends

Everyone likes a good quote - don't forget to share.

Biography

Nationality: American

Type: Author

Born: November 30, 1835

Died: April 21, 1910

Links

Quotes about Mark Twain

Find on Amazon: Mark Twain

Cite this Page: Citation

Popular Topics

Friendship Quotes

Motivational Quotes

Inspirational Quotes

Related Authors

Helen Keller
Henry David Thoreau
Zig Ziglar
Joseph Campbell
Tony Robbins
Leo Buscaglia
Anais Nin
More

Get Social with BrainyQuote

BrainyQuote Desktop

BrainyQuote Mobile

Site

Quote of the Day

Social

BQ on Pinterest

Syndication

Funny Quote Feed

Love Quote Feed

Nature Quote Feed

About Us