Conan O'Brien Quotes

Nobody in life gets exactly what they thought they were going to get. But if you work really hard and you're kind, amazing things will happen.
Conan O'Brien

Amazing, Life, Work

The beauty is that through disappointment you can gain clarity, and with clarity comes conviction and true originality.
Conan O'Brien

Beauty, True, Through

This Halloween, the most popular mask is the Arnold Schwarzenegger mask. And the best part? With a mouth full of candy you will sound just like him.
Conan O'Brien

Best, Him, Halloween

Starbucks says they are going to start putting religious quotes on cups. The very first one will say, 'Jesus! This cup is expensive!'
Conan O'Brien

Jesus, Start, Religious

In West Virginia yesterday, a man was arrested for stealing several blow-up dolls. Reportedly, police didn't have any trouble catching the man because he was completely out of breath.
Conan O'Brien

Trouble, Police, Yesterday

When all else fails there's always delusion.
Conan O'Brien

Else, Delusion, Fails

If life gives you lemons, make some kind of fruity juice.
Conan O'Brien

Life, Lemons, Juice

Pamela Anderson Lee released a statement confirming that she has had her breast implants removed. Doctors say that Pamela is doing fine and that her old implants are now dating Charlie Sheen.
Conan O'Brien

Dating, Old, Her

Scientists announced that they have located the gene for alcoholism. Scientists say they found it at a party, talking way too loudly.
Conan O'Brien

Found, Talking, Party

The results of a new study are out this week saying that New Jersey is one of the most livable states in the country. The study has a margin of error of 100 percent.
Conan O'Brien

Saying, Country, Study

Fish recognize a bad leader.
Conan O'Brien

Bad, Leader, Fish

Tom Cruise's attorney said he is going to sue anyone who claims he is gay. In a related story, Ricky Martin's attorney has been hospitalized for exhaustion.
Conan O'Brien

Gay, Said, Story

Work hard, be kind, and amazing things will happen.
Conan O'Brien

Work, Amazing, Hard

In Cleveland there is legislation moving forward to ban people from wearing pants that fit too low. However, there is lots of opposition from the plumber' union.
Conan O'Brien

Forward, Moving, Union

President Bush left for Canada today to attend a trade summit. Reportedly, the trade summit got off to an awkward start when the president pulled out his baseball cards.
Conan O'Brien

Today, Baseball, Start

Your path at 22 will not necessarily be your path at 32 or 42.
Conan O'Brien

A study in the Washington Post says that women have better verbal skills than men. I just want to say to the authors of that study: 'Duh.'
Conan O'Brien

Women, Men, Study

According to a new survey, 40 percent of adults in Mexico say they would move to the United States if they got a chance. The number would have been higher, but the other 60 percent already live here.
Conan O'Brien

Live, Here, Chance

Apparently Arnold was inspired by President Bush, who proved you can be a successful politician in this country even if English is your second language.
Conan O'Brien

Successful, Country, Inspired

Apparently the new high-tech Star Wars toys will be in stores any day now. The toys can talk and are interactive, so they can be easily distinguished from Star Wars fans.
Conan O'Brien

Talk, Star, Fans

CBS news anchor Dan Rather has interviewed Iraqi dictator Saddam Hussein. When asked what it was like to talk to a crazy man, Saddam said, 'It's not so bad.'
Conan O'Brien

Crazy, Bad, Said

During last night's debate, John Kerry and John Edwards were so friendly to each other some political experts think that they may end up running together. In fact Kerry and Edwards were so friendly, President Bush accused them of planning a gay marriage.
Conan O'Brien

Marriage, End, Gay

Earlier today, Arnold Schwarzenegger criticized the California school system, calling it disastrous. Arnold says California's schools are so bad that its graduates are willing to vote for me.
Conan O'Brien

Graduation, Today, School

Early on, they were timing my contract with an egg timer.
Conan O'Brien

Early, Egg, Timing

Every comedian dreams of hosting 'The Tonight Show' and, for seven months, I got to. I did it my way, with people I love, and I do not regret a second.
Conan O'Brien

Love, Dreams, Regret

Share with your Friends

Everyone likes a good quote - don't forget to share.

Biography

Nationality: American

Type: Entertainer

Born: April 18, 1963

Links

Find on Amazon: Conan O'Brien

Cite this Page: Citation

Popular Topics

Friendship Quotes

Motivational Quotes

Inspirational Quotes

Related Authors

Oprah Winfrey
Earl Nightingale
Jon Stewart
Rush Limbaugh
Robert Orben
Jim Henson
Roy Rogers
More

Get Social with BrainyQuote

BrainyQuote Desktop

BrainyQuote Mobile

Site

Quote of the Day

Social

BQ on Pinterest

Syndication

Funny Quote Feed

Love Quote Feed

Nature Quote Feed

About Us